(EDITORS’ NOTE –
Wizards of the Coast touched a nerve for Erik on this one. Lesson learned – get him mad about something, and he Hulks out and curses like a pirate. Be warned…)
Wizards of the Coast – thank you! Sincerely, I thank you for printing more Elder Dragons. Despite my age, I have been playing Commander since Time Spiral was printed. I had a Nicol Bolas deck at one point, as I could get my hands on an actual Elder Dragon. Since then, creatures have gotten much better, but the Elder Dragons have not aged like fine wine. Even Bolas is expensive and clunky with the upkeep demand.
But now, WotC has given us new Elder Dragons! Let us Rejoice!
Are we done rejoicing? Good. Thank you Wizards for royally fucking up!
I’ll keep this short:
- Two color Elder Dragons – not three colors. In the ‘Wedge’ block?!?!? Because the Mardu options are so grand at this point… and Jeskai has a world of not-douchebag generals….. yeah. Thanks, Wizards!
- The Elder Dragons are small! Where are the 7-power generals? We have one 8/8. Nice. Then a damn 5/7, 5/4, and a fucking 3/5! A 3-powered six-mana dragon! Elder Dragon, my ass.
- Dragonlord Kolaghan is a complete train wreck. Thank you, Wizards, for printing an Elder Dragon with an ability that is absolutely fucking useless in the format ORIGINALLY NAMED AFTER ELDER DRAGONS. This format has a 1-of rule. Here is an Elder Dragon that punishes duplicate cards. Do we see the issue?
- Dragonlord Dromoka is an absolute boring card. The Silence effect is okay, but the 2/2 with this effect is barely played in Commander. Dragonlord Ojutai has the crappy ‘hexproof except when is matters’ that Tromokratis has, and that thing sees loads of play. Yeah, that thing is going to die. Dragonlord Silumgar can’t deal damage, lost hexproof, and is actually able to be killed off to have the theft effect bound on his living negated. Not good for EDH. And Dragonlord Atarka is yet another big, dumb R/G general…but she can’t burn an opponent, so she’s basically worse than Bogardan Hellkite. And five damage divided in EDH only kills one-to-two utility creatures and may ping an opponent. May.
So thank you, Wizards. I saw Elder Dragon on a card line and peed myself like a puppy that got too excited. Then, I read the damn cards and I got so mad I threw up. Good fucking job on the Elder Dragons.
(I may or may not think the rest of the set is a goldmine for EDH cards. But the Elder Dragons and a goddamn disappointment.)