Perhaps you wanted a snapshot of what it’s like inside Mr. P’s brain.  Welcome to Hell!  It’s nice in here! Here are thirteen things that Mr. P thinks.

-If “Izzet”  is Blue-Red, then shouldn’t we call White-Black-Green “Izznt”?

-Here’s an easy solution to the Reserved List issue; since the Reserved List was established to protect the financial value of old cards, simply revise it based on this criteria: any card currently on the Reserved List that has a secondary market value of less than (some arbitrary value, possibly 5 or 10 dollars) is immediately removed from the Reserved List.  Problem solved! Your old valuable cards are still protected, and your old novelty crap is eligible to be reprinted! You’re welcome, world!

-Why is Uncle Istvan not Legendary?

-By the same token, why are the rare named lands from Zendikar (Magosi, Emeria, Valakut, etc) and the guild halls from the original Ravnica Block (Sunhome, Prahv, Rix-Maddi, etc) also not Legendary?  They are clearly specifics, unique places.  Flavor non-continuity, what?

-My new obsession is Dropfting.  In Dropfting, you show up at the draft, draft, and then drop.  All the fun of drafting, none of the terrible games!

-Staples!

Here’s a definitive list all of the cards that should absolutely be run in every EDH deck, based on color:

White: Plains

Blue: Island

Black: Swamp

Red: Mountain

Green: Forest

That was easy!

-I refuse to believe that “Tunnel Ignus” was named by accident.  Um, right on?
-Some people like to hate on Wizards of the Coast for, well, everything.  Nice life.  However, the one thing that Wizards has done that is absolutely untouchable is the creation of Gatherer.  Good lord is Gatherer the most useful tool ever for finding obscure, silly cards for Mr. P’s terrible novelty decks!  Also, if I hear you hating on Gatherer, I’ll bite you (and you’ll like it.)

-I’m 100% on board with the “color identity” rules that prohibit things like Debtors Knell from being played in decks that aren’t both black and white.  However, there’s one thing that drives me crazy about this rule: the fact that you can ONLY play the Bringers in five-color decks.  I mean, they’re not even that good, but the fact that they are identified as five color creatures when they are so specifically their respective colors makes me very sad.  Oh well.

-How come all visions of the future are dystopian?  Why doesn’t anyone ever make a movie, or TV series, or whatever where things in the future are better?

-Do you watch Fringe?  It’s pretty awesome, except for this: the characters are constantly shuttling without effort between Massive Dynamic and the research lab. Massive Dynamic is in New York City.  The research lab is in Cambridge.

Have you ever driven from Boston to New York City?  I’m guessing the people who make Fringe never have.

-You know how in the storyline the Eldrazis exist in the “space between worlds”?  You know where else they exist in the space between? Mr. P’s binders!  Seriously, which binder should I put these stupid things in? (Of course, considering my feelings on them, “the fireplace” is a good answer to that question.)

-Being that Mr. P is totally one-dimensional, Mr. P is obsessed with foils.  There is, however, one exception: for some reason, I hate playing with prerelease promo cards.  Something about that date stamped in the lower right corner of the art totally ruins it for me.  (Oh, and also the fact that many of the alternate art Prerelease cards have some of the worst artwork of all time.)

That was fun.

What do you think?

XO,

->Mr P

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Mr. P makes tacos.  The world rejoices.  Mr. P takes tacos away.  The world is crushed.  Mr. P’s tacos crush the world! (Tell your friends.)